Wsdc selections.

This is one of the only pictures i took,haha.

I honestly don't think i was good enough to qualify into the selections. The selections was to find the top 6 debaters in Malaysia. I registered just because i wanted to not have regrets later, since it's my last year debating. I chickened out last year and didn't follow Fattah, even though i was allowed to go. But i was too scared. I knew back then that i wasn't good enough. I still think the same way right now, even though it's been nearly a year. Alhamdulillah, i have a few nice achievements from my 4 years of debating that was enough for me to get chosen as top 50. Cool.
I didn't have any time to do any research or preparation since i had exams for two weeks. Selections was the day right after the last paper. I was going quite empty-handed. I've never really been prepared for competitions and stuff, because i've always relied on my teammates, particularly the think-tanks.

My mistake. This was not going to be a team thing anymore. Even though we were put into completely random teams, we were all fighting for ourselves. The really competitive ones are extremely sneaky and a little stingy, but i don't blame them at all. If i was as good as them, of course i'd do the same if i knew i wasn't guaranteed a place yet. But i was in no position to use tactics and stuff against other people. I was struggling. It was a bad time to realise so many things, especially the fact that i'm extremely not independent. I still relied on my new teammates to explain what the motion really meant, what the points should be, and yeah, lots of things. I was lucky that some of my teammates were very nice and helpful. There were some who obviously didn't care that i was gonna fail, haha. I felt mentally insecure on the first day, especially after they had a test about some articles and our general knowledge(YAYYY i got to list 10 African countries!). I had no right to feel sorry for myself though, because really i had every opportunity to grab all the knowledge i needed for debate. Due to laziness and procrastination, i had failed myself. I did terrible in most of the rounds.

Ah well.

I have no regrets. The first day Iman, Fattah and I sat together. It was funny because we all go to different institutions now. For the first time in a while, i felt...complete. We went through so much together that they've become something way more than just teammates and friends. The selections were on at the same time as Musleh ISDC 2012, so we joked about how we should debate there and get our trophy back. Ahhhh great times. Now we're growing up, heading into our own futures. Who knows, maybe one day we'll reunite :) Iman left on the first night due to medical emergencies, so i was kinda left alone. I got lost in the middle of the night, haha. Slept in a random room. Great experience, now i'm braver :D

Minus reuniting with my teammates, i still have no regrets. After Iman left i had another realisation. I was extremely bad at socializing with people. Extremely bad. That was why i got lost, because i didn't really have anyone to call because i didn't really have many friends. Most of my debater friends are at Musleh. Selections was full of people i ALWAYS see, but never really bothered to talk to.
Having no female friend always with me, i forced myself to talk to some girls. I think they're from SSP and SMSS. I can't believe i never talked to them before, they're really friendly,outgoing and nice! I even had to debate against a few of them, so got to talk to them even more after that. Yayyy. Oh and i kinda hung out with Fattah most of the time cause i still felt awkward with people. He's like my brotha :D He talked a lot with one of the SDAR guys and so i joined in their conversation and yayyy after a few years, i finally talked to SDAR peeps, haha. They're quite hilarious sometimes.

All in all, I had a great weekend :)

I wanna go to UIA after SPM :D